So there are so many things screwed up about college football, but today just one is bugging me.
It happens every December. Like snow falling in the North, and like me listening to that great Bob Rivers song “The 12 Things at Christmas that are such a pain to me” (a great tune), some big-time college football coach gets fired.
Then, a bunch of coaches at other major schools look right in the camera and lie, saying they’re not interested in any other job. They completely tell bald-faced fibs, and often belittle those in the media who have the temerity to report that said coach is interested in that new job.
And then, like Tom always getting the best of Jerry, the utterly predictable happens: That coach who said he had no interest is suddenly a top candidate for that other gig, and then gets the job.
Happened with Nick Saban. Happened with Bobby Petrino, too, and so many others. Now it’s happening with Cincy coach Brian Kelly, who’s the hot coach of the moment. Kelly spent 10 minutes at his press conference last Saturday berating the media, denying any interest in Notre Dame.
And guess who’s now the leading contender to get the Fighting Irish job? That’s right, our man Brian Kelly.
Look, I know these coaches are in a tough spot when asked about these things, but please, for the love of the truth, don’t make yourself look like an ass and lie. Just don’t say anything. Don’t confirm, don’t deny, just give us a simple “no comment” and move on.
That’s all I ask. A little integrity, please.
**In a time of such terrible news everywhere for my beloved newspaper biz, this actually made me quite happy. The Chicago Tribune and Chicago Sun-Times are stealing each other’s writers. Last week Rick Morrissey, the lead sports columnist for the Tribune, was hired away by the Sun-Times.
Now, and this I’ve never seen before, the Chicago Bears beat writer for the Sun-Times, Brad Biggs, has jumped ship in the middle of the season to go work for the Tribune.
I love it. I love that somewhere in this blessed land, two newspapers are fighting it out for readers, wooing each other’s best, and duking it out for the sports hearts and minds of Chicago.
Whoo-hoo!
**So a little over a year ago my friend Andrew, a fellow huge Jets fan (he’s actually a season-ticket holder), had a baby boy named Marcus. So I decided to buy Marcus what every baby needs: Some Jets gear from the team’s online store. I think I got him two things, and of course as part of the purchase I had to fill in my credit card info, and my email address.
So today I open MY email and find this:
Dear Marcus,
We’re so happy to see you as part of the Jets family. Tickets are going fast for our new stadium set to open in 2010 …
Cracked me up completely. If only they knew that Marcus, unlike his father, doesn’t care about the Jets yet, isn’t nearly as worried as his Dad and I are about Kellen Clemens starting this Sunday, and could care less about the new stadium.
Come to think of it, I’m told Marcus does get cranky around 4 p.m. every Sunday …. hmmm.

