Scale of 1 to 10 on last night’s Oscars? I’m going with a 7.7.
Pretty good Academy Awards show, I thought. No major surprises, no unbelievably memorable moments, but pretty good stuff all around, which I’ve come to expect. Maybe it’s me, but it seems like after being bad for a few years, the Oscars have been good for a while now.
Only wish we didn’t have SUCH predictability. Seems like we used to get more upsets. Marisa Tomei winning, or Roberto Benigni (best speech ever, just a totally insanely happy man on the best day of his life), those were genuine stunners.
Still, Sunday night had some moments, good and bad. My quick thoughts:
– OK, Kathy Ireland, you’re beautiful, and you’ve aged beautifully. But oh my God, you were the worst excuse for an interviewer in the history of the world. I mean, if awfulness were people, you’d be India. Dear God, I yearned for Ryan Seacrest, she was so bad!
– Thought Sandra Bullock had the speech of the night; you could tell she knew that unlike Meryl Streep (who shoulda won), this was one her shot ever at Oscar. She seemed really heartfelt, and I’m glad she thanked the Tuohy family (the real-life family in “The Blind Side” ) in her acceptance.
– Steve Martin and Alec Baldwin were better than I thought. Some of the opening jokes were great (The Meryl Streep-Hitler one was particularly funny, and the Steve Martin joke to Christoph Waltz about hunting for Jews was brilliant), and they kept the show moving pretty well.
– Why are we subjected to the god-awful musical numbers that go on for 412 minutes every year? Does anyone enjoy these?
– Tell you what I always DO enjoy: The Dead People Montage. I love honoring those who are no longer with us one last time, for all the good work they did while they were breathing. I do feel sorry, though, for the behind-the-scenes people they honor who never really get much applause from the audience. Patrick Swayze? Big hand from the crowd. Cinematographer guy no one’s ever heard of? Only crickets are heard.
– I knew they were going to do something for my man John Hughes, but it was better than I’d hoped. Loved seeing “The Breakfast Club” group up there. Would it have been too much to ask for them all to break out into the “dancing in the library” scene from the movie? And Anthony Michael Hall, wow, he looked totally different.
– Mo’Nique won for best supporting actress and gave a real nice speech. And no one’s making a big deal that an African-American woman got an Oscar.
I’d say that’s progress, wouldn’t you?
– Hard to believe no woman had ever won best director before; about damn time someone did. Way to go, Kathryn Bigelow. And I love that her enormously egotistical ex-husband James Cameron had to sit there and watch her win.
Just discovered that “The Hurt Locker” is already on my cable box pay per view on Demand channel. Definitely going to watch it soon.
– And finally, from my wife, who pays way more attention to Oscar fashion than I do: “Miley Cyrus, stand up straight! And that dress is totally inappropriate for a 16-year-old!”
Amen.
**So sometimes I think I’ve posted something on here that I’ve actually only emailed to a bunch of people I know (What can I tell you? I’m a fool.)
I thought I had posted this last week, but apparently, not so much. This beautiful story from the the New York Times last week, by Joanne Lipman, is about her old music teacher. When he died, his old students came together for a final tribute concert. It’s a really beautiful story.
**And finally, because that John Hughes Oscar tribute was so good, and because I feel this movie is criminally underappreciated, a funny scene from “Mr. Mom.” (I tried to find the Schooner Tuna commercial, but dammit, it’s not on Youtube.)

