Lies and the lying liars who tell them

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So one of the great and terrible things about being a reporter is that people lie to you. Constantly. Whether it’s a crooked politician, a football coach, or a criminal, you are told lies, lies and more lies.

Many of them are unverifiable. When a coach tells me a kid has a sprained ankle suffered in a practice I wasn’t at, of course I believe him. Even if I have a pretty good idea that the kid really got caught with weed in his locker. I don’t know that on the record, and I”m pretty sure the coach is just making an excuse, I still have to believe him.

So it’s not the unverifiable lies that bother me. It’s the stupid, easily debunked lies that really make me crazy. And make me question why that person would do it.

I’m telling you this because it happened again the other day. I’ve been calling this agent for a prominent athlete in our area for weeks, trying to find out where said player will be playing this season.

Guy hardly ever gets back to me, so the last few weeks have been no exception. When he does talk to me, he’s been a good source of info, and I feel like we have a decent relationship.

Anyway, he finally calls back Monday. Tells me that our player signed with an NBA team last week. When I remark that that’s why I’ve been calling him for a while, and it would’ve been great to have known that, you know, last week, he dismissively tells me that “it was on my Twitter feed weeks ago.”

For a minute, I thought, well, maybe I should’ve been checking his Twitter feed. After all, I’m a 21st century reporter. So just for the hell of it, I go on the guy’s Twitter. And what do you know, no mention whatsoever of our player. Not in passing, not in any news sense, nothing.

So why? Why did the agent lie? Did he not think I could easily check his Twitter feed and see that our guy was not on there? He could’ve told me any of a hundred things. He could’ve said he’s sorry he didn’t call back. He could’ve said that it’s not his job to tell me stuff, and I should’ve found out on my own. He could’ve said he’s been on Mars for the last three months without access to a phone.

But he didn’t. He lied flat-out, a lie that was easily disproved.

And I just wonder why people do it. I’m a bad liar, I know this, so I try to lie as little as possible (except to spare people’s feelings about the cuteness of their baby. Lying about that, I believe, is in the Constitution.)

I’m just fascinated by people who lie, knowing they could easily be trapped in it.

I’m open to any theories you, dear reader, might have on the subject.

**OK, so let me get this straight. Jessica Simpson’s dog got stolen by a coyote. That’s not the plot of a movie, that really happened?

I guess I should feel bad for her, but then I remember that she thinks Buffalo wings are from killing buffaloes, and I remember that her moron father once told Rolling Stone that, since Jessica’s album came out right around 9/11, “When those planes crashed into those buildings, it nearly demolished our career.”

And so yeah, not a lot of sympathy for her.

**It saddens me greatly that the most popular story on CNN.com earlier today was about Heidi and Spencer’s sex life.  I wish I didn’t know who they were, but sadly, I do.

***Speaking of celebrities, The Onion hits another one clear out of the park. Hilarious.

**Another fantastic episode of “Glee” Wednesday night. And another great 80s song (and a 70s classic, too) featured. As a lover of 80s music, I’m freakin’ thrilled to see it featured so much on such a good show. And mark my words, my friends, “Glee” will do for 80s music what “Mork and Mindy” did for space aliens.

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One response to “Lies and the lying liars who tell them

  1. the hardest part about being a gen x PIO was having to answer to reporters i really liked and a baby boomer boss who signed my evaluation and expected me to lie.

    after 18 years, i moved on.

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