A guest blog from a pretty “meh” night at the Oscars

barbarastreisand

Hi everyone. In lieu of my normal post-Oscar ranting and raving, my wonderful friend, fellow runner and more importantly, fellow film obsessive Diana D’Abruzzo has graciously accepted my invitation to write a guest blog on last night’s show. Diana and I have been friends for (eek!) 16 years now, since we met as cub reporters at the Wilmington Star-News. She now works in Washington, D.C., loves “The Princess Bride” as much as I do, and is usually hilarious and snarky about awards shows.

So here goes some rambling thoughts from throughout the Oscar telecast.

Take it away, Diana…

** Why didn’t they get Tina and Amy to host?” comment by William Shatner was what everyone was thinking. I’m skeptical about Seth MacFarlane. Don’t care for his humor.
  
**The cutaway to the socks in the dryer during the “Flight” puppet show was priceless.
**I’m annoyed they are using web articles as samples of tomorrow’s Oscar headlines. Why not newspapers, Academy? Not cool.
**”Hell they’re going to give it Anne,” comment by Sally Field in sketch was fabulous.
**Tommy Lee Jones is smiling so much now, I think someone did something to his face.
**Horrible bit between Melissa McCarthy and Paul Rudd. Not funny.
** The jokes about the “Beasts of the Southern Wild” girl were pretty funny, particularly the “In 16 years, she’ll be too old for Clooney.”
**Not a fan of using the “Jaws” theme to end speeches.
**Jealous Diana is actually a little happy that Jennifer Aniston is looking older.
**Bond tribute now. Guess I can take a nap
**Every time I look at Seth MacFarlane, I think of Peter Brady.
Back to back intros to “Argo” and “Zero Dark Thirty” means I better be seeing some Kyle Chandler soon.
**Jessica Chastain looks more and more like Jessica Rabbit with every awards show.
**So why isn’t the orchestra allowed in the actual Oscar auditorium? Not famous enough?
jenniferlawrence
**Oscar game: singing or lip syncing?
** The “family Von Trapp” bit was … weird. I laughed but then was like, “That’s it? That’s the whole joke?”
**As soon as Christopher Plummer walked to the mic and said “these talented actress,” I said, “just give it to Anne already.”
**There are a lot of Anne haters out there.
**I thought Jennifer Lawrence was hands down best dressed (especially if you include hair, makeup and jewelry). A close second was Stacy Keibler, unfortunately.
**I could never handle the violence of the movie but that blip from “Django Unchained” with the gunshot sound and blood hitting the cotton was so cool and unique.
**Was in the bathroom during commercial break and heard “Ladies and gentlemen, George Clooney!” Never before have I washed my hands so quickly before skidding into the living room.
**Just saw back-to-back Facebook posts from friends who don’t know each other mentioning Cher in reference to Streisand’s hair.
**Just found out I’m not the only one who hears “Memories” and immediately thinks of “scattered pic-tures” from “Big.”

**See they already knew Adele would win so there was no need to sing the other songs live. 

**Why is every women dressed like an Oscar statue  tonight?

**Dude, Dustin Hoffman is shrinking. 
**Charlize Theron’s hair is so awesome.
 
**Love the disheveled Quentin Tarantino. I normally would make fun of him, but I won the category in the Oscar pool, so I’m happy for me, er, him.
**Michael Douglas is so amused by Jane Fonda’s dramatics.
 

**If you direct a tiger you deserve an Oscar.

 
** Making a joke about how late the Oscars is running is a requirement as a host. Like it was a requirement for Kristin Chenoweth to mention her height during each red-carpet interview.
 
**Jennifer Lawrence fell… Isn’t that the worst  nightmare come true for an actress? But i have a feeling getting an Oscar probably evens things out.
 

**I don’t think Streep even opened the envelope before announcing Daniel Day-Lewis’ win!

**Loved Daniel’s speech!
**Awkward camera pause on that guy who was not Steven Spielberg as Daniel was praising Spielberg.
 
**Jack Nicholson looks like Danny Devito!

** Michelle Obama giving out Best Picture? Seriously? So stupid.

**So proud of Ben Affleck!
 
** How does Kristen Stewart get to sit behind Steven Spielberg?
** Thought the ceremony was entertaining but between the Obama appearance and the final song, it sure did end on a low note.  But Ben’s speech was great, and I’m so glad he won.
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