Well, that was all kinds of depressing.
While I was at Madison Square Garden Tuesday night watching my beloved Rangers lose to the Blues (great game, though, but my Blueshirts just couldn’t score), election returns from all over the country were pouring in, and apparently “Joe-Mentum” is real.
A guy whose campaign could barely afford to buy a postage stamp two weeks ago, a man whose mental capacity and fitness I question more and more every time I hear him speak, tore through the Super Tuesday primaries, winning a whole bunch of them.
The 77-year-old former veep won Texas, Minnesota, and Massachusetts, and Virginia, and quite a few more, while doing much better than expected in places like California.
Meanwhile, Elizabeth Warren suffered quite the ignominious defeat in her home state, coming in third in the Commonwealth. I’m officially ready to declare her Presidential ambitions for 2020 dead, and that makes me sad.
Bernie Sanders, meanwhile, won the biggest prize, California, and took Colorado and Vermont, but narrowly appears to have lost Texas.
It was a stunning reversal of fortune for him and Biden; just a few days ago (you know, like last Friday) it looked like Bernie would have a commanding delegate lead coming out of Tuesday. Now, Biden looks like he’s leading by about 70 delegates.
Remember: Nobody knows anything.
— Here’s something to think about: The President is 73 years old. The frontrunning Democrats are 77 and 78. The Senate Majority Leader is 78. The Speaker of the House is 79.
In the words of Pete Campbell from “Mad Men,” that’s not great, Bob. Septuagenarians are running everything, leaving the rest of us with the scraps.
— Wanted to write about some happy news: Chris Matthews, a sexist, misogynist masquerading as a cable TV news host of MSNBC, finally resigned Monday night after months of truly awful behavior on air. Thank goodness.
— It really was pretty nauseating, though not surprising, how the Democratic party establishment is so terrified of Bernie Sanders that all of a sudden the likes of Beto O’Rourke, who shares very little in common politically with Bernie Sanders, and Amy Klobuchar and Pete Buttigieg all rushed to endorse Biden.
On the one hand, it certainly seemed to be a concerted effort, and it has been done before in politics, but to all suddenly line up behind Biden this week after he won exactly one of the first four primaries is a bit much. (I will say this, to the Bernie fans who are so engaged in conspiracy-theory discussions: Why wasn’t the establishment helping Biden over the last several months, when he had zero money and zero momentum? If this is all a conspiracy, didn’t they wait a really long time to implement their plan?
But on the other hand… maybe voters in these 14 states were going to go for Biden all along, as they are far more representative of America than the four states that already voted, and the Buttigieg/Amy K/Beto endorsements didn’t mean all that much.
I don’t have any idea if this “establishment push” will actually help Biden beat Sanders or not, because voters don’t like to be told who to vote for. But I do have a strong idea that the man they’re all lining up for, Biden, may not be mentally fit and up to the job. Just look at this clip, for example.
It’s going to be a fascinating few months. We have clear, obvious ideological battle lines in this Sanders vs. Biden race.
And while it depresses me to no end that Elizabeth Warren, to my mind the most qualified, smartest and best candidate out there, will not get the nomination, I have to follow my heart and political soul and support the candidate that’s most progressive. And that is the 78-year-old Jewish guy from Brooklyn.
If Warren is no longer viable, I’m for Bernie.
–Oh and farewell, Michael Bloomberg, you egotistical windbag sexual harasser, and enjoy your new life in American Samoa, the only place voting Tuesday who thought you should be President.
**And now, for something completely different. Four billion years from now, our galaxy, the Milky Way, will collide with our large spiraled neighbor Andromeda. Here’s an animation of what it’ll look like.
Pretty cool, huh? Also in four billion years, I’ll still be waiting for the Jets to win the Super Bowl.
**And finally today, a few words about the death of TV personality and host James Lipton, who passed away at 93 on Monday.
For more than 20 years Lipton hosted the totally fantastic “Inside the Actor’s Studio” show on Bravo, where he would interview actors and actresses not about their boyfriends or latest movies, but about the craft of acting.
He had guests like Tom Hanks, Robert DeNiro, Will Smith, Jamie Foxx and many, many others, and the show produced indelible moments of honesty, emotion and humor. (I’ll never forget watching Meryl Streep Irish step dance on stage, damn that woman can do anything!)
Lipton took himself way too seriously, and was way too self-important, and sometimes the show could devolve into the host practically drooling over his guest (the Barbra Streisand episode, I remember in particular, was almost impossible to watch, since both people on stage loved her so much).
But when “Inside the Actor’s Studio” was great, it was so great. I’m talking about Hanks crying when talking about all the people he worked with on “Philadelphia” who are now dead, and Steven Spielberg tearing up when Lipton made a connection for him between the ending of one of his movies, and Spielberg’s parents.
And of course, his famous questionnaire at the end of every show, asking the guest what sound or noise do they love, what’s their favorite curse word, etc. always led to great answers.
Will Ferrell did a hilarious parody of Lipton on “SNL,” but the original guy was one of a kind.
R.I.P, James, and I hope you got to talk to St. Peter so you’d get to ask him at least one question (written on a blue card, of course).
Will Ferrell/James Lipton parody video, to go with