Happy Father’s Day to all my fellow Daddies out there. Hope your day was as enjoyable as mine was, when we had the family over for a socially distant afternoon of Wiffle Ball, food, and my mom kicking all our butts in cornhole, a sentence I never thought I’d write.
So you may have heard the current President of the United States had a rally on Saturday night.
It was billed as a huge, sellout “return to greatness” kind of rally for Mr. Donald Trump, but it was, to paraphrase Marcellus Wallace in “Pulp Fiction,” pretty f’ing far from great.
The arena was barely half-full, a whole bunch of teenagers seemed to have punked the campaign by registering for hundreds of thousands of tickets, and Trump was his usual blustery, nonsensical self up there.
And so, as was the theme in media leading up to the rally, a lot of what I read Sunday was basically this: Trump is cooked. Done. Finished. Biden leads in all the polls, he’s leading nationally, he’s leading in just about every swing state, and Trump is well aware the end is near. Get ready for President Biden, it’s just a matter of riding out these last few months.
To which I emphatically say: STOP. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.
It is June 22. This race is far, far from over. After the debacle of 2016 election predictions, when every “prognosticator” had Hillary Clinton winning easily as late as two weeks before the election, you would think people would’ve learned.
There is still a TON of time between now and the election. Trump looks finished now, but don’t you dare underestimate how much worse it can get. He will play dirty tricks in this campaign that would make Lee Atwater or Roger Ailes blush. He will do everything possible, just like an authoritarian strongman, to hold onto power.
And remember, this is Joe Biden we’re all pinning our hopes on. Biden could still screw this up in any number of ways: He could pick a terrible VP candidate (unlikely, but possible). He could say something monumentally stupid, which is what he does sometimes.
The economy could start to get better. Voter turnout might not be as strong as hoped. The vote-by-mail crusade to allow more Americans to cast their ballots that way could turn out to be impossibly difficult.
I’m just saying, there’s WAY too much premature dancing on Trump’s political grave right now. Way too much.
The man is like a mythical creature for a storybook: No matter how many times you think they’re dead, they still come back to life.
It’s June 22. There’s a lot of time left. There’ll be plenty of time for celebration on the night of November 3, if we’re lucky.
**Next up, my smart friend Kelly posted this on Facebook the other night and I’ve been showing it to everyone I know since (we had a great time with it on Father’s Day).
It’s one of these brain teaser games with 25 famous works of literature listed, but using synonyms for their titles. Your job is to figure out what each description refers to.
For example, I’ll give you No.1: “The Old Man and the Sea.”
Some of these were really hard and stumped me, and most of them are crazy-clever (No. 11 is my favorite).
Enjoy this brain workout.
**Finally today, I looked Sunday night for some new Father’s Day videos to share with you today, but nothing I saw was as good as this one I shared two years ago in this space. It’s a PSA from Australia in 2015, called “Dad Joke Survivors.”
It made me laugh really hard, again. I am a huge fan of Dad jokes, because of course I am. And these were so bad they were great (the constipation one is a particular favorite.)