Tag Archives: Josh McCown

Another insane political weekend, with Trump implicating himself in a crime and a horrendous tax bill passed. You can’t stop Josh McCown, or those New York Jets! And the opossum that drank a bottle of bourbon (sure).

This was something we all talked about after last November’s election: Don’t normalize this. Don’t get numb to it. The Presidency of Donald Trump will be a real thing, rolling on day after day, and there will be so many things happen that had never happened before, so many things a U.S. President would never, ever say or do that now occur on the regular. Don’t give in. Don’t ever forget that this is NOT normal.

I was thinking about that this weekend, after two pretty amazing and horrible things occurred in our federal government. First, a party that claims to be fiscally responsible, wants to cut the national debt, and pretended to be outraged at how Democrats ran things when they were in charge of the Senate decided to firewagon an enormous 479-page tax reform bill through the Senate in a matter of days, without any kind of tax score, time for hearings, question or opposing thoughts. They completely lied about it being a “middle class tax cut,” when in reality it will benefit wealthy people and corporations enormously.

They literally were writing changes to the bill in pen and handing out those copies Friday night, forcing a vote before anyone had a chance to read it. And then, despite all of the rushing and lying and the alleged “opposition” to how Trump and the GOP Senate do things from people like John McCain and Jeff Flake (frauds, both of them), managed to pass this monstrosity of a bill at around 2 a.m. Saturday

It is disgraceful and disgusting, but it is what happens now. Then, because you can always count on our President to do something stupid, he announced on Twitter that he had committed the crime of obstruction of justice.

“I had to fire General Flynn because he lied to the Vice President and the FBI,” Trump wrote in a tweet.

In other words, when Trump asked then-FBI Director James Comey to go easy on Flynn, Trump already knew Flynn had lied to the FBI. So when Comey refused to go easy on Flynn, Trump fired Comey. That is textbook obstruction of justice.

Robert Mueller, I believe your case has been made much easier thanks to the madman moron who just can’t stop Tweeting.

Portrait Of Opossum On Field By Rock

**Next up today, I have been quite derelict in posting bizarre news stories on the blog of late, so let me try to rectify that right now. This one is a beaut: The lede from an AP story in Fort Walton Beach, Fla.:

“An opossum that apparently drank bourbon after breaking into a Florida liquor store sobered up at a wildlife rescue center and was released unharmed.

Emerald Coast Wildlife Refuge officials say the opossum was brought in by a Fort Walton Beach, Florida, police officer on Nov. 24. A liquor store employee found the animal next to a broken and empty bottle of bourbon.

“A worker there found the opossum up on a shelf next to a cracked open bottle of liquor with nothing in it,” said Michelle Pettis, a technician at the refuge. “She definitely wasn’t fully acting normal.”

OK, I have SO many questions here! First, the opossum “broke into” the liquor store implies that he/she/it, like, picked a lock and disabled an alarm or snuck in through a window ledge. How do we know the opossum committed a crime? Maybe the animal just ambled in behind a few customers and no one noticed, why they gotta already criminalize the opossum?

Second, just because Otto Opossum was next to an empty bottle of bourbon doesn’t necessarily mean he drank it, right? I mean, couldn’t the opossum have been framed by a rival, like a bunny or a mouse? Where’s the hard evidence, dammit!

And finally, look, OK, it’s not easy being an opossum. Nobody gives you any respect, nobody knows if you’re spelled “opossum” or “possum” and the career opportunities just aren’t there like they are for squirrels or chipmunks. You ever seen an opossum in a bear commercial? Me either.

So if the opossum needed some bourbon to get through the day, who’s business is it, huh? I say leave the little bugger alone.

This story is priceless. My favorite line: “Pettis says the opossum did not appear to have a hangover.”

Whew.

**Finally today, if you told me that on Dec. 3 of this year, the New York freaking Jets would still be appearing in those NFL playoff scenarios on national broadcasts, I’d have tell you to go get drunk with an opossum. But damn the torpedoes and pass the liquor, my favorite tortured football team is still alive, dammit. After a stunning 38-31 win over the Kansas City Chiefs, the Jets are 5-7, which is at least three wins better than I thought they’d be for the whole season.

Josh McCown (Josh McCown!) the 38-year-0ld quarterback, threw for 366 yards on Sunday, the Chiefs defense did all it could to help Gang Green, and the awful Jets D finally made a stop at the end of the game.

Look, the Jets aren’t any good but geez Louise, they’ve won FIVE games this year, which no one expected. Todd Bowles was a good candidate to get fired before the season began; now, dude should get Coach of the Year. What an unexpectedly interesting season the Jets have carved out.

Couple other quick-hit NFL thoughts from a pretty entertaining Sunday:

— The Jacksonville Jaguars are 8-4 and going to the playoffs. Yeah, I don’t believe it either.

— There are so, so many bad quarterbacks playing right now. I was saying to my friend Sunday after the Jets’ win, that everyone knocks McCown, but you know what, he’s in the top half of NFL starting QBs right now! That’s how bad the QB situation is.

— How’d that QB switch work out, Giants? Asking for a friend.

— Not sure who the best team in the league is, but happily we know the Cleveland Browns are the worst. It is really, really hard to be this bad.

— Finally, hey Gronk, this was total, total bush league. This is why NFL players have mush for brains when they’re 50.

Is there any man left in Hollywood who hasn’t sexually harassed women? Let’s out them all. Two fabulous, cringe-worthy headlines. And the Jets are officially cooked, as it should be

I want more.

More names. More accusers. More tales of disgusting moral depravity committed weeks, months, years, decades ago. All of it, I want all of the rich and powerful men from Hollywood, the business world, media, all of them.

Let no one be left uncovered, let no woman or man who’s been abused, demeaned, raped, assaulted, made to feel incredibly uncomfortable and having no recourse to doing anything about it, have to stay in the shadows any longer.

It is obscene that so many of these men got away with this behavior for so long.  No one should be able to get away with sexual assault, I don’t care if you’re a big-shot Hollywood director, or a lowly intern in the press office.

The last few months have finally, finally shone some light on the behavior of these men. It started with Harvey Weinstein, and his ridiculous defense of criminal, horrible, sexual behavior that he “came of age in the 1960s and ’70s, when all the rules about behavior and workplaces were different. That was the culture then.”

That led to Kevin Spacey, and his equally-pathetic defense after the public outing of his molestation of a 14-year-old actor as some sort of proof he’s now admitting, that he’s gay.

And the list just grows and grows. Louis CK, Brett Ratner, Jeremy Piven, Charlie Sheen, Mark Halperin, James Toback, Dustin Hoffman, and Steven Seagal.  In all likelihood, there are hundreds and hundreds more, powerful men in suits who have gotten away with disgusting, criminal behavior for far too long.

Some people are sick of hearing about it already. Not me.

I say, I want to hear more and more of it. Not because I enjoy hearing of suffering, but because I want every single victim to speak out, and have the world know what their abuser has done.

So please, I don’t care if it’s Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, a TV or print interview, or anything else. Let’s get it all out in the open. Let every disgusting pig roast in the court of public opinion, and be forced to reckon with the pain and trauma they’ve caused.

The trickle has started. I want the flood of names. Keep them coming, brave women who are speaking out. Please, please keep them coming.

 

**Next up today, longtime readers know I love a good headline mistake, or double entendre, or misplaced or missing punctuation that would’ve helped. Two great examples of that recently, both made me laugh really hard.

First up, some students got some job experience recently. So first-hand experience. And so, a newspaper in Kansas called the Pratt Tribune wrote about it. And, well…

The hyphen! Would’ve been a pretty different headline if there was one there, no? But hey, someone has to give the students hand-job experience, they’re not going to learn how to do it on their own, are they?

Next, this was sent to me by my friend Andrew, who knew I’d laugh hard.  From the Times Daily in Alabama, above a story about Roy Moore, who, inexplicably, is still a candidate for Senate in that state.

Who knew shellfish could be so controversial?

You know, those sex clams can really be divisive, let me tell you! They’ve divided many parties I’ve been to, half the people eating them and thinking they’re delicious, the other half thinks they’re way too horny to eat. It’s a real problem.

**Finally today, it’s taken way, way longer than I expected, but yeah we can pretty much call the New York Jets done for the 2017 season. They did way better than anyone expected the first nine weeks, and I laughingly convinced myself that if they beat the 2-6 Tampa Bay Bucs Sunday, a team playing without its two best offensive players, the Jets would actually be a playoff contender.

But, you know, they stink. Josh McCown is what he is, a nice, decent quarterback. He’s got almost no weapons around him, his offensive line stinks, and the defense just can’t stop committing stupid penalties. So the Jets are 4-6, which is three or four games better than I expected, and now they play out the string. Hey, it was a nice little two month surprise.

Other NFL thoughts…

— Things I cannot understand/comprehend in the NFL right now: The Jacksonville Jaguars are 6-3. The New Orleans Saints are 7-2 after thumping Buffalo, 47-10, IN BUFFALO (Hey, I thought the Bills were finally good?) The Tennessee Titans are 6-3 as well. This has been a weird, weird year.

— Very cool to see Vikings QB Teddy Bridgewater, who has missed two years of football with a severe knee injury, tearing up at the national anthem as he dressed for his first game since 2015.

— Tom Savage started at QB for an NFL team Sunday. And Colin Kaepernick, who led a team to the Super Bowl, sits at home.

Two stories show the real danger of Trump being in charge: The people he appoints are dangerous. One last Aaron Judge highlight as Yanks go quiet for winter. And a wild NFL Sunday features my Jets blowing a big lead

There is so much badness coming at you, every day, from Donald Trump. So many idiotic, hurtful comments, so many stupid Tweets, so much bad, so much arrogance, that it’s so easy to just get swallowed up by it, and not realize that what this egomaniac asshole says and does isn’t the real danger of his Presidency.

No, as I’ve been saying to people ever since he got elected, and I’m sure I’ve said it on here a few times too, is that Trump actually being in the Oval Office, while repulsive and a permanent stain on our country, isn’t the worst thing about him beating Hillary Clinton last November.

No, the worst and most pernicious result of Trump’s election is all of the horrible, unqualified and purely corrupt-minded people who he’s put in charge of very important departments of government. I’m talking about letting Rick Perry run the Dept. of Energy, Scott Pruitt at the EPA, and so, so many others.

Trump’s not actually going to blow up the world, and I truly believe he’s going to be an afterthought of American history one day. But the people who are doing things on behalf of his government… ramifications will be felt for decades.

Two stories over the weekend really pissed me off and brought this feeling back to me again, and amazingly, none of them involve stolen Supreme Court justice Neil Gorsuch.

First, Betsy DeVos, who is trying to do to public education what what a 1-year-old does to a diaper, after previously arguing that accused campus rapists aren’t getting enough support and love, now decided to rescind 72 guidelines outlining the rights of disabled students in public schools.

And then there’s this story from the New York Times Sunday, about a former executive at the American Chemistry Council named Nancy  Beck (that’s a trade lobbying group) who, and isn’t this a coincidence, now heads a key department at the EPA and is trying to stop the EPA from tracking the harm done from a truly horrendous chemical called PFOA.

Hey, just because it’s been linked to cancer and birth defects doesn’t mean we shouldn’t let major corporations still use it and put it in products!

This stuff burns me up. Burns. Me. Up. So many f’ing corrupt, morally-compromised people (and aren’t those the only kind who would work for Trump?) damaging our world, now and in the future (I haven’t even mentioned what’s going on with climate change.)

This is why I’m still pissed about the election. It’s not Trump himself, it’s all the awful-ness going on while we’re paying attention to his latest idiotic controversy.

 

**Next up today, Saturday night was a sad one for us Yankees fans, as their bats were feeble again (what, they can’t get hits in Texas?) and the Houston Astros moved on to the World Series with a thrilling Game 7 win.

But it was an amazing season for the Bombers, mainly because of a 6-foot-7 mega-human named Aaron James Judge. Even non-baseball fans like my wife are amazed at what this dude can do, and as a parting gift in the Yanks’ season finale, he made this incredible catch above.

**OK, so looking at this on the glass is half-empty side of the coin: Sure, my New York Jets have blown 14-point leads in both of their last two games, and lost both of them.
But hey, two months ago, me and the rest of the long-suffering diehards never thought they’d be in position to blow leads that big, because we never thought they’d ever be up by 14 points.

Happy to say I spent a delightful Sunday with my wife and sun at the New York Hall of Science in Queens, an absolutely fabulous place we’ve been to 5-6 times already, and missed seeing the Jets implode. But following it online, I did say to my wife when the Jets knocked Dolphins QB Jay Cutler out of the game with injury, “That may be the worst thing the Jets could’ve done.” Because as we all know, Cutler stinks, and his backup, Matt Moore, promptly led the ‘Fins to a comeback win.

Jets QB Josh McCown played great… until a horrible interception in the final minute gave Miami an easy field goal for the win. Ah, Josh McCown, you 38-year-old tease, you.
Ah well. Jets are now 3-4, and squarely in the middle of a mediocre season. Which is more than we expected.

Couple other quick-hit NFL thoughts:

— Is HBO’s “Hard Knocks” show a jinx? Man, every year the team they feature seems to have a miserable season. Tampa Bay has gotten off to a terrible 2-4 start after seeming like they’d be a great squad following last year. Maybe next year “Hard Knocks” can just do the Browns and then we won’t be surprised when they stink.

— So much for that Super Bowl rematch Sunday night. The Falcons looked like they still haven’t recovered from the Super Bowl debacle when they blew a 28-3 lead. Patriots beat them every which way on Sunday.

— The hell has gotten into the San Diego (sorry, L.A.) Chargers? Despite having no fans at their games rooting for them, they’ve won 3 in a row and look legit now. Shutting out the Broncos is damn impressive.

— Finally,  why can’t I have been born a Pittsburgh Steelers fan? Every year I think this will be the year they stink and fall off and then every year you look up and they’re 5-2 and in first place. They are truly the model NFL franchise (and don’t seem to cheat like the Patriots do.)

The strangest Jets season of my life: Do I root for them to win, or lose (they won again Sunday). Michael Che on fire on “SNL” season premiere. And “Curb Your Enthusiasm” is back, yay!

I have been a fan of the New York Jets since 1981, when I was 6 years old, and Richard Todd was the quarterback, Freeman McNeil was the running back, and they went all the way to the AFC Championship game before losing to Miami, 14-0, and A.J. Duhe intercepted Todd about 32 times that day. That was my first Jets heartbreak, and of course it was followed by 4,328 more.

I have watched Jets games in many states, physically (and I believe in 2-3 other countries), and in many states, emotionally (often sad, depressed, questioning my life choices as the third quarter bleeds down and the Jets are losing 31-6).

I didn’t think any new feelings or emotions watching the Jets could still be had, but here we are 36 years after my first becoming a fan, and something new and weird is happening.

I’m watching the 2017 Jets, and part of me wants them to lose. And another part of me yells at the part of me that wants them to lose and screams “Are you crazy?”

This hasn’t happened before. Oh, there have been games where, for the purposes of playoff matchups or something like that, I’ve been like “OK, fine, whatever, they lost, it’s better they’re now playing Team X instead of Y)

But not for an entire season. But here’s the deal: The Jets have done everything possible to be terrible this season. They’ve traded or cut just about all of their talented veteran players, in the hopes of being so bad, they’ll get a shot at a No. 1 pick and one of the many highly-rated college quarterbacks who are expected to be available in the next NFL Draft.

This is how you have to do it in the NFL, if you’re bad but not bad enough to get a top pick. You don’t “tank,” per se, but you strip your roster down and expect the worst.

Which is what is supposed to be happening to the Jets this year. Right now they are supposed to be 0-4, looking feeble on offense, defense and in coaching. And I mentally prepared myself for that before the season. Look, they haven’t had a franchise QB in forever, even if you count Chad Pennington and that was 15 years ago!

So I was totally prepared to suck it up, lose interest a little this year, and watch them go 2-14, or even better, 1-15.

And yet… they are tied in the standings today with the New England Patriots. How much money in Vegas you could’ve won if you’d taken that bet five weeks ago, I can only imagine.

But this ragtag bunch of nobodies, led by a 38-year-old quarterback who remembers renting VHS tapes as a kid, has won two straight games, including 23-20 over Jacksonville Sunday.

And as I’m watching this, I’m secretly happy my team is winning, because it doesn’t happen that often, but I’m also pissed because they’re blowing their chance to finally get what so many other franchise’s fans have gotten: A truly amazing QB. Who the hell wants to go 6-10 (which is where they’re headed this year) and get a left tackle or a defensive back? Let’s be horrendous, historically awful and get the next Peyton Manning or Drew Brees!

It’s a weird, weird feeling to kind of hope your team loses, because you know long-term, that would benefit them the most.

But hey, the Jets have 2 wins, and the Giants have zero. And that’s something to smile about if you’re me today.

Couple other quick-hit NFL thoughts:

— The Patriots defense is bad. Really, really bad. Maybe as bad as it’s been under Belichick. They’ve given up the second-most points in the whole league (128). Figures the year the Jets decide to try to lose, is the year New England finally falls back a little.

— The Rams are 3-1 and still aren’t any good. The Giants are 0-4 and I can’t believe they’re this bad. They play next week, so maybe I’ll be right about one of those things.

— Hey Chargers owner Dean Spanos, how’s that move to L.A. working out? Your team is 0-4 and can’t fill a 27,000 seat stadium.

**Next up, “Saturday Night Live” had its season premiere on Saturday night, and as expected, had a field day with the actions and Tweets of the 4-year-old currently occupying the Oval Office. The whole “Weekend Update” segment on Hurricane Maria was fantastic, but here’s just a small snippet of Michael Che, saying what so many of us are saying, but not on national television.

I know I’ve said this before, but can the man get any lower than calling the Puerto Rican people lazy and saying “they want everything to be done for them,” before claiming the Democrats instructed the San Juan mayor to be “nasty” to him and then continually bringing up the territory’s debt?

As Charlie Pierce aptly said on Twitter this weekend, “Don’t know what the metric is for measuring how much of a heartless, soulless hellbat a POTUS is, I’m pretty sure we broke the meter today.”

**Finally today, “Curb Your Enthusiasm” is back! I’m super, super excited to see what the funniest show on TV has left after a six-year absence, though one should never doubt the insanity that lurks inside the mind of Larry David.

The season 9 premiere was Sunday night, and I haven’t watched it yet, but someone on the Internet gave me a good idea: They were telling someone about “Curb” and wondered if you had to show them one scene to sum up what it’s about, what would you show. They chose this clip, which is great, but I like this one: Larry and Cheryl, on a road trip to her sister’s husband’s baptism in the river.

Another Friends of Jaclyn “Angel Walk” makes me so grateful. Federer/Nadal playing doubles together was awesome. And NFL Week 3 was bananas and unpredictable (the Jets even won!)

Sunday was a glorious and sad day, at the same time for me. The day my family and I participate in the Friends of Jaclyn Angel Walk always is.

I’ve written a lot about the Friends of Jaclyn Foundation here, because it is the No.1 charitable cause near and dear to my heart. Pairing up high school and college sports teams with children suffering from pediatric brain tumors and other deadly cancers, FOJ is an incredible beacon of light for thousands of sick children, and for the athletes on teams who adopt them. (All my stories on FOJ’s kids and teams can be found here, if you’re interested.) It is run by wonderful, kind-hearted people who work so hard to make so many lives better.

Every year FOJ holds an “Angel Walk,” to honor those children who have died at some point after being adopted by a team. While thousands of children are thriving and beating cancer, way too many others bravely lost their battle (we’ve lost 144 children overall, since FOJ’s founding. And so every year, teams, athletes, families and others involved in FOJ meet at the Bridge over the Hudson River in Poughkeepsie, N.Y., to keep memories alive.

There are speeches given by players and coaches, and by founders Denis and Jaclyn Murphy. We walk across the bridge, bagpipes are played, and at the end of the ceremonies, white doves are released into the sky, as a symbol of those who we lost.

It’s a glorious day because we come together and show our support for so many, for such a good cause. But it’s a sad day because of all we have lost.

My favorite comment every year in a speech came Sunday from a University of Hartford basketball coach named Matt Mihalich, who said “I can’t wait until FOJ becomes obsolete. Because that means there’ll be no more pediatric cancers.”

Amen to that. But while there still is, this beautiful ceremony every year makes me realize how important FOJ’s work is.

**Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal have done so many amazing things in their careers; they are two of the 5 or 6 best male players ever, they’ve made more money than small countries take in in a year, and they have absolutely nothing left to prove.

But what they’d never done, not in any real competition, is play doubles together. It’s so unusual to even think about, the two best players of an era teaming up on the same side of the court. Did Borg and McEnroe ever play as a team? Sampras and Agassi? Navratilova and Evert? Nope.

But at a newfangled tennis competition this past weekend called the Laver Cup, Federer and Nadal actually teamed up. The competition is Europe vs. the World, so once again the best rivalry in the sport were oddly on the same team.

And it was … jarring to watch. But so much fun. I knew they were the same height, even with such different body types, but seeing them standing next to each other was great. They made mistakes as a team, seemed to constantly be smiling, and it was just a joy to watch.

Highlights above. Who says tennis season has to end after the U.S. Open?

**After a couple of really drab weeks of NFL football, Sunday was filled with fabulous games, none of which I saw since (see above) I was out all day. But lots to catch up on…

— J-E-T-… wait, what??? They WON? Don’t they realize they’re supposed to tank, go 0-16, and draft No.1? Can’t even do the “losing on purpose” thing right.
No, I’m kidding. I knew they were going to win at least 2-3 games this year, because it’s really really hard to go 0-16. Sunday the Dolphins helpfully decided to roll over and play dead, the Jets defense decided to show up (what, you’re allowed to tackle before the end zone?), and Josh McCown at quarterback actually played pretty damn well. 4-12 here we come, baby!

— The Jets have more wins the Giants. Never thought I’d say that this year. A 61-yard field goal at the buzzer by the Eagles’ rookie kicker, Jake Elliott to win the game?  Crazy.

— Also, Odell Beckham Jr. made ridiculously impressive TD catches for the Giants. Then somehow decided it was a good idea to pantomime a dog peeing in the end zone for one celebration, drawing a flag. So, you know, business as usual for him.

— Go ahead, bet on the NFL: Saints crush Panthers. Bears beat Steelers. Jets dominate Dolphins. Yeah, I’m sure everyone predicted that Sunday morning.

— NFL referees are still horrible. Just thought I’d let you know that. Lions got totally screwed Sunday on that TD at the end of the game, not being called a TD.

— Never underestimate our current President’s ability to make new enemies. During a rambling, mostly incoherent 9o-minute speech in Alabama Friday night, the Orange Grifter managed to piss off both NFL players AND owners, not an easy task. The owners in particular, nearly all of whom are wealthy white men who are Republicans, came out strongly against Trump’s idiotic comments, releasing all kinds of strong statements like this one from Giants owners John Mara and Steve Tisch.

This is all well and good, these owners making statements condemning Trump. But I guarantee you most of them gave money to the RNC or Trump personally last year; suddenly they are realizing what he is, because he’s attacking football? They didn’t know he was a sexual abusing, racist arrogant a-hole in 2016?
Still, it was good to see some owners standing with their players, and even better to see SO many players either kneeling, or in the Steelers, Titans and Seahawks’ cases, refuse to even come out on the field for the national anthem.

–One more time, for the people who still think, like our President does, that this is about “disrespecting the flag.” It’s not. It’s never been. It’s been about protesting the racial injustices in our society, that see African-Americans and other minorities get the short end of the stick on everything, and white police officers never, ever getting made to pay the price for their deeds. That’s it.d That’s what this is about.

Of course these players love America. They just hate how unequal things are now, not as bad as they’ve ever been of course, but still pretty bad.