Tag Archives: Mark Sanchez

The Emmy Awards make me (mostly) happy. An agonizingly awful Jets win. And gay marriage ballot amendments looking good

My favorite awards show of the year took place Sunday night; The Academy Awards are great but so many times I feel like I’m not familiar with the nominees; but with the Emmys, I feel like I very strongly about who should win and who should never get a sniff of an Emmy.

Overall I thought it was a pretty good show, and was thrilled to see one show in particular kick serious butt (it rhymes with “Shmomeland.”)
With the help of my trusty sidekick/fellow TV addict fiance, some things that struck us from the show:

— Thrill of the night for me was seeing “Homeland” do so well, winning both major drama acting categories AND shocking “Mad Men” to win best show. I will continue to say this until the cows come home: “Homeland” is the best show on TV. The new season starts Sunday night on Showtime, time to get watching.

— The comedy awards were really predictable, but we were both stunned Mayim Bialik from “Big Bang Theory” didn’t win best supporting in a comedy. She was awesome. Not that Julie Bowen isn’t, but she’s won a few times already.
— Jimmy Kimmel’s monologue was pretty funny, but the best bits of the night were the Julia Louis-Dreyfus/Amy Poehler speech switch gag, and the opening skit in the bathroom.
— Jon Cryer does not age. He still looks like Ducky.
— Jimmy Fallon looked 3 feet taller than Kathy Bates when they presented together. “Has he been stretched for the Emmys?” the fiance asked.
— There were no major fashion faux pas (I was told), but man were there some hideous dress colors. Julianne Moore, Claire Danes and Julie Bowen all wore awful colors. I thought Danes, Amy Poehler and Zooey Deschanel (above) looked the best, along with the chick who plays Brody’s wife on “Homeland.”

— Really tough call for the producers on who gets the final spot of the Death Montage: Dick Clark or Andy Griffith? They did a seperate tribute to Andy G. instead.
— Can’t believe Doyle from “Gilmore Girls” won an Emmy for writing! He was such a great “GG” character, happy to see him get some more fame.

— Finally, whose idea was the stupid “Andre Braugher coming up in 8 minutes” screen teaser? Like that’s going to keep me watching the Emmys?

**At the end of my life, when I’m old and bald and dying, I’ll wish I had four more hours back.

Those would be the four hours I spent watching Sunday’s truly wretched Jets-Dolphins football game. Calling it ugly and unsightly would be a massive understatement; truly it was a shame either team had to win.
As a Jets fan, I was disgusted by so much of their play that it was hard to feel elated when they won.
Among the many, many problems of my team:
— Mark Sanchez, in his 4th year in the NFL, and 4th year as a starter, is not getting any better. It’s amazing, but he’s STILL making awful decisions, not feeling the rush, and misfiring to wide-open receivers; there were three TD’s the Jets should’ve had Sunday but Sanchez overthrew his receivers.  He’s just not a good quarterback and may never be.

— That said, the man had VERY little help Sunday. Receivers dropped passes all over the place, his offensive line was just OK, and the running game was non-existent. Sanchez just doesn’t have a lot of talent around him.

— Looks like the best defensive back in football, Darrelle Revis, may have torn his ACL, which would mean he’s out for the season. Devastating blow to an already-not-great team.

Other NFL thoughts on yet another crazy day…
— At one point three games were in overtime at the same time (KC-New Orleans, Jets-Dolphins, and Titans-Lions). Not sure that’s ever happened before.

— How crazy was that 44-41 Titans win over the Lions? Detroit scored 14 points in the last eighteen seconds of regulation to tie it, including a Hail Mary. Then in OT, down three, Lions could’ve kicked a FG to tie it, but on 4th and 1, had a miscommunication with the sideline and went for it when they weren’t supposed to. And they didn’t get the yard, and lost the game.

— I know all NFL fans are bitching about the replacement refs and how awful they are… but they are truly horrendous.  Watched the last 5 minutes of Pats-Ravens after the Emmys, and while it was a thrilling finish (that Ravens kicker gave the entire state of Maryland a heart attack, making that FG by inches), the refs practically blew it both ways.

How long is the NFL going to let this complete blow to its credibility last? Sadly, I think it’ll be a while. The NFL’s popularity is impervious, and I just don’t think they give a crap what fans and media (and their own coaches and players!) are saying about the refs right now.

— Stunning to see the 49ers lose, the Jaguars win, and the Saints be 0-3. One more reason I don’t bet on the NFL.

** Finally, it’s too early to be overly excited about this, but it’s certainly promising.  There are four states that in November will have ballot initiatives that in one form or another will legalize same sex marriage, and in three of those states (Maryland, Maine and Washington) it looks very likely that gay marriage will be legalized; only in Minnesota is the polling not looking promising.

If the 3 states’ numbers hold up, this will be a huge, history-making deal, as no states previously have had ballot initiatives supporting gay marriage get passed.

Consider my fingers crossed.



The Jets crash back to Earth, and the Giants win a wild one. Thoughts on Rosh Hashanah. And another NHL lockout makes me sad

Well, that’s more like what I expected this season.
My New York Jets shocked most people by scoring 48 points in an easy season-opening win last week.  Maybe they won’t be as bad as we think, right?
Um, yeah, reality struck on Sunday.
Sunday against Pittsburgh, my boys in green and white couldn’t run, couldn’t throw, couldn’t catch, and couldn’t tackle much at all in the second half, and fell to a much better Steelers team, 27-10.
Mark Sanchez was wild with his throws, the running game was non-existent after the first quarter, I have no idea why the hell Tim Tebow’s on the team if they’re not going to use him (he barely played Sunday), and I’m starting to wonder if the pass rush really has gotten any better, since they’re still not knocking down quarterbacks.

Just as I didn’t overreact with glee to the Week 1 win, not going to overreact a bad Week 2 loss. Still, they better win next week, because after that the Jets have San Fran and Houston, probably the 2 best teams in the league right now.

Some other quick-hit NFL thoughts on a wild week:
Watched that Giants-Bucs game in a sports bar and I can’t remember a wilder swing of emotions from fans watching their team. First Giants were awful, then great, then awful, then great. What a nutty and crazy 41-34 win over Tampa. Good Eli and Bad Eli both out in full force.
— Not sure if the Redskins and Panthers will be any good this year, but man they are so fun to watch. RGIII has an enormous arm.
— Cannot believe the Patriots lost that game to Arizona when the Cards begged them to take it in the final two minutes. I was happy, but stunned, when Brady’s boys lost.
–Is it me, or is there WAY more fighting and scuffling after the play this year? Maybe it’s because the replacement refs have no control over these games.
— Best play I saw all day: Reggie Bush’s run over the Raiders. Maybe he’ll finally become the star this year we all thought he’d be.

**Wanted to give a shout out all my fellow Members of the Tribe today and wish you all a Happy New Year, as we celebrate Rosh Hashanah together. As a kid, I loved Rosh because it meant days off from school, but I hated going to synagogue and sitting through interminable and boring services. My friends and I used to sneak out to the bathroom and just hang out there to kill time, we were so bored.

Now? I go to temple rarely, so services like the one I went to Sunday night wasn’t so bad. I’m a Reform Jew, and I was at a Reform synagogue I’d never been to, and one thing I noticed was how many men weren’t wearing yarmulkes. Seems strange to me.
Still, it was enjoyable and mercifully pretty quick. A Happy New Year to all.

**Finally, stop me if you’ve heard this before, hockey fans (and yes, I acknowledge that I may be talking to myself here). A great season ends, capped by a fabulous playoff run by a major market team, and with all that excitement for another season starting … the owners lock out the players, and months will go by before we see hockey again.
So damn frustrating, but for the third time in 17 years, the NHL owners have decided they’ve given players too much money and don’t want to do it anymore, so are shutting down the sport. As of Friday night, the NHL is closed. And it looks like it might be closed for a long, long time.

As usual, I side with the players here; they gave back a whole lot during the last lockout in 2004-05, and now the owners want further concessions. It’s the same old b.s.; the owners declare they’re losing tons of money, but won’t show us the books.
Man, Gary Bettman’s got some legacy as commissioner, huh? Three disgusting, unnecessary lockouts on his watch. Just a disgrace.

A glorious opening day win for the Jets, and other NFL thoughts. A scary trip across the highway for some ducks. And Serena wins a thrilling U.S. Open final

Well that was a hell of a way to start the NFL season.

My expectations for the New York Jets are low this year, and I thought Sunday against Buffalo would be a really tough game.
And yet midway through the third quarter, my boys led 41-7.
Most stunning opening-day Jets win since the Parcells era started, when they kicked the hell out of Seattle, 41-3 back in ’97.
Sunday, everything worked beautifully, except the Tim Tebow Wildcat plays. Mark Sanchez was terrific, throwing with great accuracy and poise. The O-line was impossibly good, keeping Sanchez upright. The wide receivers, including the rookie Stephen Hill who dropped lots of passes in the preseason, consistently got open.
And the defense, except for a bad stretch in the 4th quarter, was excellent, pressuring Bills QB Ryan Fitzpatrick (who really isn’t any good) and intercepting three passes.
Maybe Sunday will be as good as it gets in 2012 for the Jets. One game doesn’t make  a season. Still, it was a whole lotta fun seeing this offense click, seeing new heroes emerge, and all that stuff.
A happy Sunday for me and the other long-suffering members of Gang Green Nation.

Some other NFL thoughts from a wild week 1:
— I think this anecdote sums up all you need to say about Robert Griffin III and the Washington Redskins, who beat the Saints 40-32.
As RGIII sliced and diced New Orleans, I texted my good friend Tony, who’s been a ‘Skins fan his whole life and for the past 15 years has suffered through one awful QB after another:
“So how you liking RGIII?” I wrote.
“I am sexually aroused,” he replied.
Yeah, Washington fans are excited.
— Got totally confused when I saw the Vikings kick a field goal in OT Sunday to beat the Jaguars, only the game kept going. New OT rules say if first team that gets the ball only kicks a FG, the other team gets one chance to score. I love the rule change.

— Speaking of rules, the replacement refs were pretty bad Sunday, missing a ton of calls. Unfortunately, they didn’t screw up so royally that they cost a team a game, which is what it’s going to take to get the NFL and the “real” refs back to work.
— It is so great seeing Peyton Manning back playing football, and playing so well. But geez is it weird to see him in Broncos orange. As weird as it was for me seeing Montana in a Chiefs jersey, and Favre in a Jets/Vikings jersey.

**And now, for a pretty harrowing piece of video I saw on Deadspin.com the other day. A mother duck leads her flock across a busy highway. Let me assure you before you watch: They all make it safely across.
But if I’m those ducks, I’m waddling over to Duck Protective Services and filing an abuse complaint against my momma.

**I do not like Serena Williams, not much at all. I think she is arrogant, and highly disrespectful toward officials and line judges, and oftentimes wholly dismissive of her opponent when that foe defeats Serena.
And so I generally root against her, despite fully acknowledging the fact that she’s one of the five greatest women’s players of all time.
But even I who dislikes her so much had to admire her guts and performance on Sunday in the U.S. Open final. She beat Victoria Azarenka, 6-2, 2-6, 7-5 in dramatic fashion, coming back from 5-3 down in the final set to win the last four games and the match.
She is an incredible competitor, Serena is, and even when it looks like she’s down and out (Sunday she was mostly beating herself, but full marks to the shrieking Azarenka for hanging in there), she’s never quite done. She hit some superb forehands in the game at 5-5 to hold serve, and then closed the match out.
She’s been through a lot these last few years, some of which was her own doing, other parts of it (like the life-threatening embolism she had) were unfortunate luck.

Serena’s one of the greatest female athletes ever, and love her or hate her, she makes tennis more interesting.
Oh, and my pick on today’s Murray-Djokovic final? Should be a classic. Just have a feeling Murray is due to break through. The Scotsman wins it in 4.

A few words on outdoor summer eating. A GOP Senate candidate says the dumbest thing. And it’s too early for me to be angry about the Jets, right?

A few words this morning on a subject hardly of Earth-shattering importance, but about a ritual we all take for granted.
Nothing to me says summer like a great meal on an outdoor deck/porch at a laid-back beach-side restaurant.

From the moment you walk out there, with music playing, the small waves making noise a few feet away, beer flowing, flip-flops bouncing off the wooden ground … it all just goes together to make the meal that much better.

It’s hard to explain, but when the air is warm and the cold drinks are flowing, and the smell of fresh fish, corn on the cob (a very underrated side dish!) and burgers permeating from each table, everyone just seems less stressed.
I had two dinners this weekend with family, both on outdoor decks, and both times I left the restaurant wishing I could eat like that all-year round.

Maybe it wouldn’t be so special if we did it year-round. But man, I sure do enjoy it.

**It’s almost fall, in a major election year, so political junkies like me have their radar up for anyone saying anything remotely stupid.
But boy, you certainly didn’t need an antenna to believe that what Missouri GOP U.S. Senate candidate Todd Akin said this weekend was just about the most idiotic thing said in 2012.
If you missed it, Akin was talking about why he opposed abortion in all cases, even in rape and incest. And this was his direct quote:

“From what I understand from doctors, that’s really rare. If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that down. But let’s assume that maybe that didn’t work or something. I think there should be some punishment, but the punishment ought to be on the rapist and not attacking the child.”

Wow. Despite the many, many, many questions I have for Mr. Akin after that quote (first question: how, exactly, does the female body “shut that down” when a man is raping her?), I think we’ll just let it hang there. Listen to him speak it (above), it doesn’t get any better.

Todd Akin, you would hope, is finished as a politician. What a disgusting thing to say.

**I know it’s only preseason. I know I’ve got five months of NFL football ahead of me. But there I was late Saturday night, watching the 1st half of the Jets game, and I was getting angry. Furious, pissed, whatever word I can usually use to describe my mood during autumn Sundays when the green and white are playing.

It doesn’t count, but holy hell did the Jets look awful. Offensive line was horrendous (Why is Wayne Hunter still on this team???). Running game, mostly non-existent. Wide receivers, OK, I know the top three were out injured, but they did nothing.
And the two quarterbacks (which is one too many, of course) both looked awful. Mark Sanchez, it’s year 4, you can’t be making idiotic throws like the one you made Saturday that got run back for a touchdown. And Tim Tebow, well, I can’t really get mad at him for being what he is: A poor NFL quarterback who has no business starting in the league.
It’s been two preseason games, and the Jets have two field goals. Combined.

Way too early for me to get this frustrated, fellas.

Tim Tebow and why I have never been more disgusted to be a Jets fan. And Facebook helps a man’s two current wives connect

It’s totally irrational. I’m 36 years old, I have a great life, a loving and beautiful girlfriend, a terrific family, and so many good things around me.

And yet I allow myself to get completely worked up and pissed off because my favorite professional football team continues to do the stupidest things possible.
Seriously, it’s like they TRY to anger every single fan they have.
Let me start to discuss  the Jets acquiring of Tim Tebow in a trade by saying this: In three decades of being a fan, I have never been more frustrated and angry at the Jets than I was today.
Wasn’t this mad during the Kotite years. Wasn’t this mad during the ’86 playoff game with Cleveland, or the many, many late-season swoons.

I’m going to try to keep this rant as concise as possible: This is a terrible, terrible, terrible move for the Jets. For so many reasons.

First of all, let’s start with this: TIM TEBOW IS NOT A GOOD NFL QUARTERBACK. Seems to me that if you’re going to acquire a player as controversial as Tebow, you might want him to be kind of good. Tebow has terrible accuracy, a not-very strong arm, and has trouble completing simple passes.
Next, how about this: You just gave Mark Sanchez, your franchise QB, a huge new contract extension, telling him how wonderful he is, how you’re committed to him, yada yada yada.
Now you bring in a guy who, to millions of football fans, is a cult hero, a messiah-like figure. And as soon as Sanchez throws a few interceptions next season, you’re going to hear the drumbeat from the stands of “Te-bow!,” Te-bow!”

It will go on all season, and it will be loud, and it will be an enormous distraction. It’s going to make Sanchez feel awful, but that’s not the worst part. The worst part is Tebow IS NOT AN UPGRADE. So even if they do pull Sanchez, things won’t get better.

Then there are these reasons to hate the deal: You gave away two draft picks for a guy who will only play 8-10 plays per game in the Wildcat, if things are going well; nobody runs the Wildcat effectively in the NFL anymore so even Tebow’s effectiveness there is in doubt; you’re adding a highly polarizing figure to a locker room that already has plenty, and just let me throw this out there, in total seriousness:

There’s a huge contingent of Jets fans who are Jewish. Do you think they’ll feel all warm and fuzzy about a high-profile Jets player who believes that all of us Members of the Tribe are going to hell? (A great tweet today from Parks and Recreation writer Michael Schnur: “Well, if there’s one place a crusading Christian and decidedly mediocre athlete should mesh perfectly with the local culture, it’s New York.”)

Ugh. I just hate this so much. This reeks of the Jets wanting to make headlines, steal some of the Giants’ thunder (here’s a way to steal their thunder: Win a Super Bowl!!!) and get people talking about them.
I don’t know who this franchise is anymore. They’re the pro sports equivalent of a dope fiend hanging out on the corner, doing anything to get their next high. When that one fades, got to get another one. Peyton Manning doesn’t want to play here? We’ll go get God’s quarterback!

It’s the middle of March. I really shouldn’t get this worked up over the Jets.
But I hate them right now, and everything they’ve become.

**OK, moving on to a less-inflammatory topic: Bigamy.
I laughed quite heartily about this story. It seems that a county corrections officer in Washington state has been charged with bigamy after Facebook helped uncover his secret double life.
What happened? According to this story, Alan O’Neill’s first wife recently found out about Wife No. 2 when Facebook detected their connection to O’Neill and suggested the friendship connection.
Well sure, they have a “friend” in common!  Wife No. 1 then called O’Neill’s mother (fabulous!), and a short time later the police got involved.

Alan, Alan, Alan. It’s the first rule of plural marriage: Stay the hell off Facebook.

The Jets come apart in a horrible end to the season. A Happy New Year starts with yoga. And Ben Affleck, reconsidered

Well, that was just a fine and dandy way for the Jets to finish their season, eh?

As I suffered through most of the game on TV from Southern California (amazingly, it was the local game here yesterday; even when I try to get away from the Jets, they find me), I had very little interest or passion for it, I found. They are so unworthy of making the playoffs, and I knew even a good performance against Miami wouldn’t wipe away the stench of this disappointing season.
But you know, I gotta hand it to the boys, they still managed to tick me off. Mark Sanchez with three more truly brutal interceptions, two by defensive linemen. A sieve-like offensive line allowing the Dolphins to do whatever they wanted.

And a defense that played, once again, just badly enough to lose. More fun continued toward the end of the game, when star receiver/ultimate diva Santonio Holmes yelled at teammates in the huddle and was then benched for the final few minutes. I love Santonio’s production but good Christ he is just such a pain in the ass.

I really don’t have much more to say about this awful team. I expect they’ll fire offensive coordinator Brian Schottenheimer, deservedly so, and I guess you have to give Sanchez one more year before giving up and realizing he’s not the answer at QB (as my smart friend David pointed out, fix the O-line, hire a good coordinator, and then see if Sanchez gets better).
I’ve been spoiled by the boys the last two years, and now this 8-8 season feels so much worse because we really thought the Jets were on the verge of something great.

Maybe it’s because I’m in SoCal, but I seem to have gotten over this loss pretty fast. Maybe I should move out here; the Jets won’t bother me as much.

**A Happy New Year to all of you out there on the Internets. I started mine by doing something completely new: My best friend Clay’s wife Amanda is a certified yoga instructor, and she gave me my first-ever lesson last night. I’ve always been pretty dubious about yoga; I know it helps people, centers you, good for breathing and stretching, all that stuff. But it wasn’t for me, I always thought.
After one session, I’m not a total convert, but I did enjoy it. Stretching muscles in different ways than I normally do was fun and only a little painful. The breathing really did seem to relax me (I almost fell asleep during Savasana  at the end). And challenging yourself in ways you’re not used to is always a good way to start the year.

Don’t sign me up for a yoga class yet, but I definitely am starting to see the appeal.

**Finally, a couple words on Ben Affleck. We watched the movie “The Company Men” last night, and he was really good in it. I don’t think he gets enough credit for being a good actor. He’s always been a pretty boy type, but I think he’s really come a long way. Sure, he still makes stupid movies sometimes, but in serious films like “Gone Baby Gone,” “The Town,” and now this one, he really has grown a huge amount in terms of acting ability.
I think he’s way better as a thespian than Matt Damon, his old buddy.

Anyway, check out “The Company Men” if you haven’t seen it. Depressing for most of the film, it lifts you up at the end. Really good performances from Affleck, Chris Cooper and Tommy Lee Jones, too.

“Carnage” totally worth your time at the movies. Who’s a bigger fraud, the Jets or the Giants? And a 4-year-old’s reaction to “Empire Strikes Back.”

I have a general rule in life that I never see the movie adaptation of a book I’ve read and liked.

Because nine times out of 10 when I’ve done that in the past, the movie has stunk, and I end up getting mad because it’s not as good as the book, and the movie’s terribleness almost ruins the memory of how good the book was. Happened to me with “The Firm,” happened with “Presumed Innocent,” and many others before I passed my self-rule.

But until Friday I don’t think I’d ever seen the movie of a play I’d loved. But then I saw the new flick “Carnage,” starring Jodie Foster, Kate Winslet, John C. Reilly, and Christoph Waltz. And it was superb. Brilliant. Phenomenal. Almost the equal of the Broadway play it’s based on “God of Carnage,” that I saw a few years ago with James Gandolfini and Jeff Daniels.

The very simple plot is this: Two 11-year-old schoolboys get into a fight on the playground, with one knocking two of the other boy’s teeth out with a stick. The parents of both boys then get together to discuss what should be done about it.
That’s it. That’s the whole movie. Four people in an apartment, talking. But it’s so much more than that. The writing is cracklingly good, with Foster and Waltz both giving amazing performances as well. The emotions that each of the quartet goes through, and as well drawn as each character is, is truly something special to behold.

It’s funny, it’s dark, and it’s pretty entertaining for a movie that’s set all in one place. Reilly has the best one-liners, and Winslet is her usual fabulous self, but all four are terrific. Go see it when it’s playing near you (supposed to get nationwide release in early January).

**Since I moved back to NY I always enjoy listening to WFAN on Mondays to see which team’s fans, the Jets or the Giants, are the most bitter and miserable. It’s rare that they both play equally awful on the same week, but yep, the Jets and Giants tried to outdo each other in the “pathetic” category Sunday.

My Jets were horrendous. Down 21-0 before you could even say “Mark Gastineau,” they self-destructed on defense, offense, everywhere. Santonio Holmes cost ’em at least seven points, then acted like a 4-year-old moron with his idiotic TD celebration when he finally did catch the ball.

Mark Sanchez wasn’t good, the defense was non-existent, and it’s remarkable how many blowout losses my boys have had this year; the coaching preparation has been highly lacking. I don’t think this team deserves to make the playoffs, but I have a funny feeling the green and white will get in, again.

Fortunately for NY football fans, the Jets and Giants play each other this Saturday, so somebody’s fans will have a Merry Christmas.

I sure as hell hope it’s me.

Couple other quick-hit NFL thoughts today:
 0-13 Indy finally wins. 13-0 Green Bay loses to a Kansas City team that stinks. Two more reasons I never gamble on the NFL.
— I gotta start watching Detroit Lions games every week. They always play thrilling, down-to-the wire finishes. Man that Calvin Johnson is phenomenal.
— It’s gotta suck to be a Buffalo Bills fan. Seven straight losses, after a 5-2 start.
— Finally, here’s hoping Tebow-mania dies down a little this week. Funny what happens when he plays a really good team.

**Finally, this is just superb. A father filmed his 4-year-old son watching “The Empire Strikes Back” for the first time, right at the part where Vader gives his “Luke, I am your father” speech. Kid’s face is priceless:

The insanity of a report card for 10-month-olds. The Giants and Jets win in very different ways. And why the Internet spoils holiday cards

You ever hear something and get enraged for a few seconds, then start laughing so hard your sides hurt and tears are streaming down your face, because it’s so absurd?
Check this out: My girlfriend and I were in Philly this weekend, visiting friends (some of hers, some of mine). Saturday night we’re at her friends’ house, hanging with them and their adorable 11-month old son.
We’re talking about the craziness of parents and teachers putting pressure and grades on kids at a younger and younger age.
And the husband, Dan, tells me:  “You’re going to think I’m making this up, but (their son) got a progress report from day care last week.
“Shut the hell up,” I said.
“No, he really did. And it had stuff on it like “bangs two things together,” with grades like “occasionally, often, or never. “What,” Dan asked, “is a good grade there?!? I mean, my kid got “occasionally,” is that good?”
Progress reports for a kid who has not yet celebrated a birthday. Of course he bangs two things together, he’s 10 months old!

Even better, the baby’s mom told me she was asked on a form recently to list his “hobbies.”

HOBBIES? He’s 10 months old!??? What do you think his hobbies are, bass-fishing and stamp-collecting?!?!.
I’d say his hobbies are pretty much relegated to drooling, sticking food on his face, and pooping in his pants.
Hobbies. Made me laugh so hard I couldn’t breathe.

**Missed my first Jets game of the season Sunday (see above note with me being in Philadelphia). But through the magic of DVR and highlights, I see that I missed a pretty thorough beatdown. Looks like Mark Sanchez played great, Shonn Greene ran hard (thanks for waiting until I was eliminated from fantasy football playoff contention to help my team out this year, buddy!), and the defense did what it should do:  Easily crush a bad offense.

And whaddaya know? You look up at the end of the day and the football Gods smiled on my boys. Oakland lost. Tennessee got beat. And Houston and its third-string quarterback, T.J. Yates, rallied in the final three seconds to beat Cincy. So the Jets are now 8-5 and in sole possession of the last wild-card spot in the AFC. Win out, and the Jets make the playoffs. Easy (ha.)

–Meanwhile, what an insane finish to the Giants-Cowboys game. Eli Manning rallies the Giants from 12 points down in the final four minutes, Cowboys get in position to tie and send game into OT, and Dallas kicker Dan Bailey gets his kick blocked and the Giants win, 37-34. Good heavens Eli is having a fantastic year.

— Also, Oakland is now learning what Cincy fans already knew: Carson Palmer is beyond washed up.
— Tim Tebow. Yeah, I got nothin’ to say. The world is just aligning for him this year. I’m giving up trying to question or explain it.

**So like most of you, I’ve gotten a few holiday cards this year from friends and family, with pictures of their adorable kids on them.
And it got me to thinking: This is another tradition the Internet has changed and maybe even, kinda ruined. It used to be, you’d get holiday cards from friends and relatives and you’d see pictures of their kids. And if they lived far away and you saw them infrequently, maybe it was the first pictures of the kids you’d seen since last year. And it was cool, watching kids grow up one holiday card at a time.

Now, you can see every new tooth, every bad haircut, every growth spurt on Facebook or any other online photo album. The mystery’s gone, because you can see every day of a kid’s life.

Not saying this is a bad thing. But it’s just one area of life that’s a little less mysterious, and I feel like we’ve lost a lot of the mystery of life through the Internet.

Ugly but beautiful: Jets rally to beat Redskins, and some more NFL thoughts. Boeheim finally gets it on sex abuse charges. And similes that are awesome.

It seems that ugly will have to be beautiful for Jets fans this year. Once again Sunday, my boys in green and white played pretty miserable offensive football for 3 1/2 quarters against the godawful Washington Redskins, and it looked like the men of Sanchez would go down to defeat. A loss that would pretty much end any playoff hopes.

Watching at my friend David’s apartment, I was resigned to their fate. But then they had to screw with me again, playing a great last six minutes, and winning going away, 34-19.
Mark Sanchez made some big throws at the end when he had to. The defense stepped up big-time (Aaron Maybin, where you been all my life?). And hey, they even managed to not fumble the last couple of punts! That in itself was thrilling.

Washington is terrible. Rex Grossman is a crime against quarterbacking; he makes Tim Tebow look like Dan Marino. And I’m still not sure my Jets are any good. But they are what they are; 7-5 with an easy schedule the rest of the way that may allow them to make the playoffs.

And how could I argue with that? I can’t, that’s how. Today is a good day.

Some other quick-hitting NFL thoughts…

— That Giants-Packers game was phenomenally entertaining. Aaron Rodgers and the Pack won 38-35 on a last-second field goal, but man the Giants showed a lot of moxie and explosiveness in keeping it close. I just don’t know if you can play QB any better than Rodgers is right now. I had zero doubt, with the game tied at 35 and a minute left, that he would lead the Pack down for the winning points at the end. Dude is frighteningly good right now.

— Ah, Detroit Lions, nice to see you’re still the bad boys of the NFL. I so want to root for them since Lions fans have been down for so long, but more thuggish behavior was on display Sunday night against the Saints.

— Been a long time since a Colts-Patriots game was that meaningless.
— I have no explanation for Tim Tebow and his continued end of game magic.
— One day Terry Bradshaw’s forehead will swallow the entire FOX studio.

**Next up today, a hilarious Washington Post project, asking readers to come up with the most tortured similes they could. They crowned 56 winners. A few of my favorites:

32. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
32. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

and my personal favorite…
22. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant and she was the East River.

Check out the rest of them here for a good Monday laugh.

**Finally today, a few words about Syracuse men’s basketball coach Jim Boeheim. There are few coaches I have disliked more over my lifetime. I find Boeheim to be a smug, whiny, arrogant jerk who constantly complains he’s put upon, and generally acts like a jackass in interviews and during games.

And so I was a little bit pleased to see, after Boeheim jumped all over the accusers in this Bernie Fine case (if you don’t know what I’m talking about, Boeheim’s longtime assistant has been accused of sexual molestation by three men who worked for the team when they were teenagers), to see him have to back off once more accusers started coming forward.

But I have to admit, after admitting he was wrong to so quickly call the accusers liars, he’s been really, really smart in his comments. Check out this story from the Syracuse Post-Standard over the weekend, and hear the contrition and concern in Boeheim’s voice. I think this case has really shaken him, and he seems committed to finding the truth now. Sure, this could all just be phony PR from him, but I don’t think it is. Judge for yourself.

A thoroughly entertaining “Muppets” movie. The Jets almost kill me again. In a win. And a heartbreaking story about homeless kids

I had every expectation that I would the love new “Muppets” movie. Loved The Muppets as a kid, and had heard nothing but great things about this resurrection of the franchise.
I am so happy to report that “The Muppets” was fantastic. Brilliant. Filled with heart, humor and plenty of interesting story plot points to keep the kids and the adults laughing (in the theatre I was in, it was split about 50/50 kids to adults).
Jason Segel, who basically persuaded Disney to do another “Muppets” movie, is terrific. Amy Adams is great, and the new Muppet, Walter, is a great addition. I got misty-eyed when Kermit sang “The Rainbow Connection,” it’s the truth. Miss Piggy was as charming as ever.
There were also a few ingenious winks at the grown-ups in the crowd (Amy Adams had the best one of these, which I won’t spoil), and a genuine sense that this was a labor of love.

Can’t recommend the movie highly enough. Watching this film was like watching a family you loved getting back together.

**Another week, another Jets game that had me pulling my last remaining hairs out.  This time my boys in green and white did almost everything possible to lose (fumbling punts, throwing interceptions, forgetting to cover receivers) but pulled one out of their rears anyway, 28-24 over Buffalo.

Some quick-hit thoughts from the Jets’ roller-coaster win:
— Say this about Mark Sanchez: Every throw he makes is exciting for someone. Sometimes he throws it to the wrong team, but on just about every strike he hits somebody in the hands.  Sanchez again made some awful decisions Sunday, threw a terrible interception that led to a TD and easily could’ve had two or three more passes picked off. But the kid made two fantastic plays at the end (helped by a great catch by Plaxico) to help the Jets win. As my fellow die-hard friend David texted me after the win, that’s what makes Sanchez so infuriating. He clearly has the talent to be great, but I don’t know if he’ll ever put it together.
— Can anyone on the Jets catch a punt and not fumble? Anyone?
— Jets aren’t going to the playoffs. They’re just not very good. Sunday confirmed all that in spades.
— Forget about his ridiculous and classless and not all that funny end zone dance imitating Plaxico Burress. The reason Buffalo’s Stevie Johnson should be infamous today is because he dropped a wide-open possible TD pass on his team’s final drive. Brutal.

–Speaking of which, my man Bob Costas brilliantly called out these moron NFL celebration artists on “Sunday Night Football” in this scathing two-minute essay. Costas is 100 percent right.
A few more scattered NFL thoughts:
— Boy the Tim Tebow haters have to really be mad today. Another win for Denver’s wonderboy QB.
— Here’s something you don’t see every day: Chargers kicker Nick Novak, a short time before his missed FG at the end of the game that would’ve won it, decided to take a leak on the sideline.
He took a leak, then pissed away his team’s chances (Ba bum bump. I’m here all week. Try the veal.)

**Eight months ago, “60 Minutes” did a wonderful but heartbreaking story about homeless families in Central Florida, and what the true impact of this economic recession has been. Sunday night they caught up with the kids they were following. Things have gotten worse. Watch this and see what this recession has wrought: So many homeless children, with no end in sight.