Tag Archives: “Modern Family”

The Emmys are here! I make fearless predictions. And a 9-month pregnancy video in 6 seconds

breaking-bad-season-6-walt-jesse

So it’s a great and happy Monday for two reasons: The U.S. Open starts today (yay!, always my favorite event of the year, and I’ve got tickets for Tuesday and Wednesday, provided my wife doesn’t go into labor on either of those days), an d at night, for those of us who love TV, it’s the Super Bowl of TV: The Emmys, seemingly forever held on Sunday nights but for some reason this year being held on a Monday.

The major categories seem even more impossible to predict than usual this year, partly because there was so much fantastic TV in the past 12 months, and also because there’ve been lots of new winners in recent years who are nominated again.

Herewith, my totally amateur handicapping of the Emmys, with who will win and who I hope will win:

Best Drama Series:
WHO WILL WIN
: “Breaking Bad”
WHO I WANT TO WIN: “Breaking Bad.”
A brutally tough category. As someone who just finished the entire run of “Breaking Bad” (probably going to be a blog post on this epic series sometime this week), and considering how much amazing press the show got from critics and fans when it ended, I can’t see how anyone beats it. “Mad Men” was terrific this year, and I know lots of people loved “True Detective,” but it’s Heisenberg’s world and we’re just meth customers looking for the blue stuff.

Best Comedy Series:
WHO WILL WIN
: “Orange is the New Black”
WHO I WANT TO WIN: “Silicon Valley.”
This really wasn’t that great a year for “Modern Family,” and “Big Bang Theory” is on a major decline, so I expect the hot Netflix show to win (I didn’t love OITNB as much as I thought I would). “Silicon Valley” has zero chance, but I loved it.

 

Best Actor in A Drama:
WHO WILL WIN
: Bryan Cranston
WHO I WANT TO WIN: Bryan Cranston
Incredible performances by all the nominees; Kevin Spacey will get some love, as will Jon Hamm, but there is no way on freaking Earth that Cranston doesn’t win this. Walter White was one of the best TV characters of all time. I know everyone is giving this to Matthew McConaughey, and I’m sure he is fantastic on “True Detective.” But it’s got to be Cranston.

Best Actress in A Drama:
WHO WILL WIN
: Kerry Washington
WHO I WANT TO WIN: Lizzy Caplan
If Claire Danes from “Homeland” wins again I may hurl objects at my TV. Caplan is sensational in “Masters of Sex,” but I don’t think enough people watched it for her to win.

Best Actor in a Comedy:
WHO WILL WIN: Jim Parsons
WHO I WANT TO WIN: Louis C.K.
Parsons is practically an Emmy institution by this point, though his Sheldon character is long past his expiration date.

Best Actress in a Comedy:
WHO WILL WIN: Julia Louis-Dreyfus
WHO I WANT TO WIN: Julia Louis-Dreyfus
I could see Lena Dunham or Amy Poehler winning here, too.

As for the other categories, Aaron Paul will definitely win for supporting actor in a drama, while Anna Gunn or Christine Baranski should win supporting actress.
Comedy supporting nods will probably go to Ty Burrell (though Tony Hale is awesome on “Veep”) and the incredibly awesome Allison Janney for “Mom.”

**Finally today, I rarely post Vines on here because most of them are pretty entertaining but not usually worth sharing.
This one, though, I love love love, and not just because I’m living with a person who has just gone through nine months of being pregnant.
It was posted on Vine by a man named Ian Padgham and a woman named Claire Vasquier, and it’s just fantastic. Enjoy.

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A great Colbert spoof on Paul Ryan. The Atari 2600 turns 35 years old. And a Greek soccer team gets sponsored by a brothel

**Still laughing as I write this at Wednesday night’s “Modern Family.” Man that show brings the funny every week. My favorite line tonight? “What are you, a flapper? And where did you get that shirt, Forever 1921?”

I have been remiss in not writing about the fine work being done by Stephen Colbert lately. But this bit about Paul Ryan’s volunteer work at a soup kitchen, and the new “charity” Colbert is starting for him, had me in stitches.

Man, how do you screw up a photo op at a soup kitchen? Hard to do.

**It’s appropriate that one of my best friends from childhood, Marc, sent me the following story, since he and I spent hours upon hours of our childhood playing the subject of the story.

This week, the Atari 2600 celebrated its 35th birthday. I literally remember the first day my parents bought one for my sister and I, and we gathered around the new color TV to play “Combat,” “Space Invaders,” and the other awesome games.
The hours I spent in the basement trying to master “Kaboom,” kicking the computer’s butt in Activision Ice Hockey, and shooting down planes in “River Raid” were some of my happiest childhood memories.

(Of course, then there was the day when my mother unplugged the “Asteroids” game I was getting my all-time high score on, just because the school bus was outside honking. Like missing one day of school woulda killed me. I flipped the board three times, for heaven’s sakes!)

This story commemorating the anniversary of the revolutionary game system had a ton of interesting facts in it; if you had an Atari, I predict you’ll enjoy (and how great is the button that allows you to say whether you have a color or b/w TV?

**Finally, a hat tip to my friend Will for this delightful story. We all know the Greece economy is in the crapper, but it’s gotten so bad for sports teams there that a soccer squad has taken to having a brothel sponsor them.

Yep, the Voukefalas team now wears jerseys embroidered with “Villa Erotica” and “Soula’s House of History,” two bordellos it recruited as sponsors after drastic government spending cuts left the country’s sports clubs facing ruin.

Hey, you gotta do what you’ve gotta do. I can only imagine that their victory after-parties are the hottest ticket in town.

And hey, where better to shrug off the disappointment of a loss than with one of the finest women in Greece, who’s paid to make you happy?

I see this catching on in America. How long until we see the “Scores” New York Knicks, or the “Cathouse” UNLV Rebels?

The lady who stole a hearse, took it for joyride. A crazy H.S. football play. And the delightful Sofia Vergara

I think this story pretty much speaks for itself.
A 23-year-old West Virginia woman named Angela DeHart was having a fight with her girlfriend while they were driving, and DeHart got out of the car angrily.
She then started walking up the road and spotted a hearse parked outside a funeral home, unattended.
So she jumped in the hearse and sped off.
With a corpse still in the back of the hearse.
She was charged with grand larceny and “displacement of a dead body” which sounds like an awesome charge to have on your rap sheet, doesn’t it?

**I know it’s only mid-September, but this has to be the craziest touchdown of the year. Check out this play from a Connecticut high school football game last week. If you’re like me, you’ll probably need to see the replay to see how the hell it happened:

Vodpod videos no longer available.

**Who doesn’t love Sofia Vergara from “Modern Family?” She’s awesome on the show and not bad to look at either, of course.
Someone took the time to put together a short video of her “greatest hits” in mispronunciation on the show.

Enjoy.

An excellent Emmys show rewards “FNL” and “Modern Family,” rightfully so. And a Jets laugher tops a crazy NFL day

Thoroughly enjoyed Sunday night’s Emmy Awards, hosted by the awesome Jane Lynch. Quite a few rambling thoughts after watching a telecast where some very deserving people were finally honored:
— Thought Jane Lynch did a great job as host. Kept things moving.
— I know people will complain that “Modern Family” won too much, but it is a fantastic and funny show. And Ty Burrell gave a great speech.
— Loved that the six nominees for best supporting actress in a comedy all came up on stage and stood there like it was a beauty pageant. Hilarious. And glad Sookie from “Gilmore Girls” won! Always liked her.
— Amy Poehler, we love you, but man, that dress was awful (see above). After much debate, I decided she looked like an extra from “Avatar” in that thing.
— Umm, Michael Bolton, in a pirate costume, with that hair??? Really not a good idea.

— COULD NOT be happier for “Friday Night Lights” getting two wins, including the awesome Kyle Chandler for his portrayal of Coach Taylor. So, so well deserved.
— The Charlie Sheen thing was weird. No reason he should’ve been up there at all. At least he was nice. But he is so undeserving of our attention.
— Lots of people I read tonight seem to have hated the “in Memoriam” montage being sung by those four guys (their group is The Canadian Tenors) but I really liked it. Thought all their voices were beautiful together.
— Finally, Ashton Kutcher. Painfully unfunny as usual. Who decided a long time ago that he had talent? Because I can’t see a damn bit of it.

**Ah, nice to have a breather of a win for my Jets every now and again.
The boys in green and white completely beat up the Jacksonville Jaguars and their inept quarterback, Luke McCown, on Sunday. Thirty-two to three, and I barely had any stressful moments. Except when Mark Sanchez threw those two awful interceptions.
Didn’t kill them today, but the next three weeks Jets face Oakland, Baltimore and New England. Sanchize has to play better. But I loved the defense today.
Few other NFL thoughts:
— What an insane game that Oakland-Buffalo contest was. Back and forth the whole fourth quarter, Bills score 35 points in the second half (35!) and win 38-35. If the Bills are for real, AFC East got a whole lot more interesting.
— More surprising than the Bills being 2-0 are the Redskins being 2-0. Rex Grossman fever, catch it!
— What a surprise: Michael Vick got hurt for the Eagles tonight. Oh well, I’m sure all Philly fans will be happy with Vince Young as their starter next week.
— Finally, another great reminder not to overreact to one game. The Ravens thump the Steelers last week, then fall flat against Tennessee. Pittsburgh looked terrible last week, then blanked Seattle. The NFL, where nothing is written in stone.

A great night at the Emmys. And rude service-people do so much damage

Love the Emmy Awards. Always one of my favorite TV nights of the year. And yet I’m always disappointed and angry when my favorite shows don’t win.
Except Sunday night, they almost all did. Stunning to see quality rewarded. Thrilled that “Modern Family” and “Mad Men” both took home the big prize.

A few rambling thoughts from my brain from last night’s show, which I found very entertaining:

**Very nice job by Jimmy Fallon. Surprised at how good he was. The opening sketch was great, and I loved Fallon’s musical tribute to the three shows that went off the air. Brilliant.

**LL Cool J. As my wife said, “Dude, you’re like in your 50s. Time to take off the Kangol hat.”

**Jane Lynch had to win for her role in “Glee.” I only wish she wore the track suit and did a “Sue’s Corner” while she was up there.

**Great speech by Eric Stonestreet, Cameron from “Modern Family.” I loved that he said he’s giving the Emmy to his parents so they can see it every day “and realize what they made possible for me.” Very touching.

**January Jones is beautiful, but that was a pretty awful dress, I think.
**And Lauren Graham, sweetheart, I love you, but what the hell were you wearing? Not good.

**So glad Al Pacino won for the Jack Kevorkian movie “You Don’t Know Jack.” Although that was a rambling, weird speech, Al.

**I’m a huge fan of the death montage every year, and I loved this year’s, with Jewel singing along with it. But Dennis Wolper is the last person we see? He’s the most important death of the last year? And yeah, I moaned a little seeing Boner Stubone and Corey Haim in the montage. So sad.

**I like George Clooney more and more these days, because he can laugh at himself. That’s rare with famous people.

**Guess I should see that “Temple Grandin” HBO movie. I think it won like 412 awards.

**Finally, a long overdue win for Jim Parsons, Sheldon on “The Big Bang Theory.” Such a great show, and such a great part. Really, it was a terrific night for people who like good TV.

**So I found myself in a department store in the mall the other day, and I had a pretty crappy experience with a saleslady.
This woman was rude, dismissive of the story I told (that a product I was told was in stock by another employee a short time earlier on the phone, now wasn’t in stock, it appeared), and just extremely off-putting.

And I wonder if she realizes how uncomfortable she made the situation for me. And how I simply won’t shop there again, because of her attitude. And that for all she knows I could be a big spender.  Just like I would patronize a store that gave me great customer service, just because they were nice, customers like me avoid stores because of one bad attitude from one employee.

I know retail work isn’t easy; I’m not saying every person should be as enthusiastic and helpful as Richard Simmons on a case of Jolt cola (do they still make that?).

But the damage one person can do to a store’s reputation is unbelievable.

As usual, media completely overreacts on election results. And “Glee” and “Modern Family” rule again

Not sure why this set me off today, but it did.

Tuesday night was a reasonably big political primary night in America. We had some close races, and for a liberal like me, things went very well. The awful Blanche Lincoln, who’s as much a Democrat as Rush Limbaugh, has been forced into a runoff and could very well lose in Arkansas. Arlen Specter, ancient and also not really a Democrat, has been beaten by a real Democrat.

Anyway, the other big story was Rand Paul, a Tea Party favorite, winning in Kentucky.

So of course Wednesday I go online and read some reaction and all I see is media overreaction. We love nothing more than a good theme, us reporter types, and if the theme isn’t quite there, well, damn the torpedoes and we push the theme anyway.

So because Rand Paul won, the headlines are about the Tea Party totally changing the 2010 elections, and everything is different now.

And since Specter lost, I read headlines like “Specter defeat signals a wave against incumbents” in the New York Times.

But you know what? Maybe Specter lost because Democrats in Pennsylvania were sick of him and they knew he wasn’t a real Dem. And maybe Rand Paul won because he tapped into some voter anger in Kentucky and was just a better candidate.

I’m not saying that incumbents aren’t in danger, they might be. But it just ticks me off how the media takes what could be 1 or 2 isolated events, and automatically applies them everywhere else.

I think it’s lazy and way too easy to do. And I wish my fellow journalists wouldn’t do it so darn much. Sometimes one race is just one race.

**So the last “Modern Family” of the season aired Wednesday night. And I am sad. What an amazing first season it was. The biggest surprise in TV, to me, in many years, “Modern Family” just hit so many perfect notes, in almost every episode.

The one Wednesday night wasn’t the best of the year (though Cameron singing “Ave Maria” while Mitchell chased the pigeon was pure genius); I think my favorites are still the pilot, and the one with Phil trying to teach Hailey how to work the TV remote control.

It’s rare that TV networks actually keep shows on the air that are smart AND funny, but “Modern Family” is coming back next year, since, happily, so many people appreciate and get its smart humor.

**As for “Glee,” another fabulous episode this week. Ever since Idina Menzel, a Lea Michele (Rachel) lookalike, guest-starred, I wondered what they would do with her. Well, we got our answer. I always knew that Jesse was up to no good.

The music kicked butt again this week; you can’t go wrong with “Piano Man,” songs from Les Miz, and the best of all, Artie the wheelchair kid leading a flash mob at the mall in “The Safety Dance.”

Not enough Sue and not enough Puck this week, but hey, it’s a freaking huge cast.

Finally, can we stop for a minute and appreciate how Neil Patrick Harris’ second career has totally dwarfed his first? Admit it, 10 years ago, we all figured he’d always be “the kid who played Doogie Howser, M.D.”

But look at him now: he’s a bona fide TV star, hosts the Emmys and the Tonys, and is pretty much as popular a guy as you will find.

Of course, some of us will always remember him for this … God, that was a great show. (By the way, someone once told me I reminded them of Vinnie Delpino. Not sure it was a compliment).

Riffing on LeBron’s Moment, “Modern Family,” a dessert I just discovered, and an inspirational wrestler

My brain is tired and my mind is scattering like pool balls after Minnesota Fats chalks up.  So four (reasonably) quick thoughts for your Thursday pleasure:

My man-crush on LeBron James has not abated after his disastrous performance in Game 5 of the Cavs-Celtics series the other night. My man LeBron has been ripped to shreds by ESPN’s Sports Guy, Bill Simmons, and analyzed to death by so many others.

He was awful Tuesday night. Really, really bad, in a game his team desperately needed him. Which sets up a delicious Game 6 tonight in Boston, Cavs-Celtics. Just like Game 6 in Detroit a few years ago, when the kid took it upon himself to will his team to win, this is a defining “Career Game” for LeBron.

If he and the Cavs somehow blow this series (and Mike Brown, the coach, should absolutely be fired if they do), it’s a stain on his career. He had the better team, the most talent, and still lost.

LeBron and Co. also need to win this game because I don’t think the long-suffering people of Cleveland could deal with a Game 6 loss, followed by their superstar walking off the court for the last time as a Cav, before heading to New York to play for the Knicks.

His reputation, his future, the sports karma of an entire city, are on No.23’s shoulders tonight.

So, yeah, might be interesting to watch. I say LeBron comes through with 35 points, 18 rebounds, and 8 assists, and Cleveland gets to a Game 7. Game on.

**”Modern Family” just continues to get better and better. Two incredibly awesome lines in Wednesday night’s episode.

First, from Cameron, on the topic of their friends: “We actually know a couple named Lewis and Clark. Clark went to New Orleans once and bought a belt. He called it his Louisiana Purchase.”

And then, from the always-fantastic Luke: “Manny is crazy. Did you know we had a fire drill last night? Not the hotel. Just me and him.”

God I love this show.

**So reason 4,242 I love my wife: She introduced me to an awesome new (old) dessert tonight. Take two slices of pound cake, toast them in the oven for a little while, then put a scoop of vanilla ice cream in between them, sandwich-like.

Oh my God, it was freaking amazing. She said her mom taught her that years ago. Clearly my mother was busy with other things, like teaching me how to tie my shoes and read and other useless crap like that. Seriously, get some pound cake next time you’re at the store; you’ll thank me.


**Finally, I love inspirational stories. When they involve a kid I once covered, even better. A kid named Dan Bishop is from Whitehall, N.Y., near my old stomping grounds of Glens Falls. Bishop was paralyzed in a wrestling accident two months ago.

Sunday, he walked across the stage of the University of Buffalo at his college graduation. Read his amazing story, and hear from Bishop himself,  here.